Kids With Special Needs

By Terri Mauro, About.com Guide

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Happy Valentine's Day!

Tuesday February 14, 2012

Chances are your preparations for Valentine's Day have mostly revolved around your child. I'm happy to be over the days when Valentine's Day meant getting my son to put some sort of signature on a bunch of tiny cards for his classmates -- though now, I'm worried about him successfully buying a flower at the high-school auditorium for the girl who might pound him if he doesn't. Always some potential for disaster on this day of hearts and candy. But for the moment, enjoy some Valentine fun for parents of kids with special needs, on pages here and on other special-needs parenting blogs (which, if you like them, you might nominate for a Readers' Choice Award. Hint, hint.)

If you're feeling in need of inspiration, go directly to the Love Notes for Special Parents gallery. (Note that these are also available in last-minute-printable cards for sharing with the special parents in your life).
Need a laugh more? The Special-Needs Parent's Wish List works just as well for Valentine's Day as other times of year.
I've updated my list of Books With Heart to include books I've reviewed with the word "love" or "heart" in the title. A trip to the bookstore is a nice gift to yourself. Especially if they also sell coffee and chocolate.
Have you seen the way Sunday Stilwell adapted the Ryan Gosling meme for special needs on her blog Adventures in Extreme Parenthood? Perfect mix of humor and beefcake for Valentine's Day time-killing. Enjoy parts I and II on Sunday's blog, and parts III and IV on Rhiannon Fieri's blog Unhandicapping the Disabled Life.
Ellen Seidman has some tart Conversation Hearts for Special Parents as her Valentine's gift to us on Love That Max (also in video form). For something a little sweeter, check out the greeting from therapy dog Jack on Judy Winter's blog Winter Ramblings.
On her blog Kidneys and Eyes, Julia Roberts offers an Ode to You on Valentine's Day that spotlights what's awesome about parents of kids with special needs. I second that.

What good special-needs Valentine stuff are you reading and smiling over today? Share it in the comments so we can all enjoy. And don't forget, a great way to show your love to the bloggers and authors and app-makers and community members who keep you going all through the year is to nominate them for Readers' Choice Awards. (Sorry, the nagging about nominations ends tomorrow. And then you get a whole week off before I start nagging you to vote on the finalists.)

All Sorts of Ways to Say 'I Love You'

Monday February 13, 2012

Hands I asked for your stories about the first time your child said "I love you," and Mama Bear-NOS submitted a response yesterday that made me smile:

My youngest has a host of letters for diagnostic purposes. He has had a ST in his life since the NICU. So, it's no surprise that speech wasn't a strong suit for him. He learned a lot from repeating phrases and scripting. So, one night, completely out of the blue...he repeated "I wuv you" after I did while tucking him in for the night. I know it was just him repeating a phrase...but it is still just as precious. Who says echolalia is a bad thing?!?

Another Valentine-appropriate response this weekend came from reader Donald, who replied to my question about what to do when there's nothing to do with this:

Tell them how much they mean to you and do something that they want to do. Do it and tell them how much fun it was (even if it wasn't). That's true love.

For more ideas along those lines, read my list of 31 Ways to Tell Your Child "I Love You," and add your own. And speaking of love, why not show some to your favorite special-needs blogs, books, apps, and resources by nominating them for Readers' Choice Awards? There are only three days left in this phase of the awards, so give your favorites the support they need to make it to the finals. I'm particularly in need of guidance in the three book categories -- Favorite New Special-Needs Parenting Book, Favorite New Special-Needs Memoir, and Favorite New Special-Needs Children's Book -- to select the books you'd most like to see recognized. Add your support!

_{Photo by Marili Forastieri/Getty Images}

Weekly Round-Up: Week of Feb. 6

Sunday February 12, 2012

Here's your weekend round-up of all the new content you may have missed from the past week on About Parenting Special Needs.

New Articles and Pages

Blog Posts

Updated Pages

Valentine Hugs and More Fun Things to Do

Saturday February 11, 2012

Stop by here every Saturday for a family activity, a site for the kids, a shopping site, a site offering humor or inspiration about parenting children with special needs, and a site that's just silly or fun, all designed to get you through your weekend with kids amused and spirits intact. Today's list:

Activity: Family Hug Valentine
Kids' Site: Alphabetimals
Shopping: Bald Brave Beautiful T-Shirts
Humor: Special Needs Ryan Gosling (and parts II, III, and IV)
Just for Fun: Nominate Your Favorite Resources for Readers' Choice Awards

What's the Nicest Thing Anybody Ever Said About Your Child?

Friday February 10, 2012

Most of the submissions to the Readers Respond page on What's the Nicest Thing Anybody Ever Said About Your Child? share lovely comments by relatives or teachers or friends or other adults. A submission yesterday, though, made me laugh for its delightful look at what youngsters find nice to say. Wrote reader Md:

"One of my children's church boys was talking about my 5 year old son, who is autistic and hyperkinetic, and said (without knowing I was standing there) 'Dude. Alex is just beast. The beastest of the beast. He totally rocks.' There isn't much higher compliment from a 10 year old, trust me."

Friday's a good day for sharing happy stories. Has someone said something about your child that filled you with pride or just tickled you? Share it on the Readers Respond page.

Your Nominations for the 2012 Readers' Choice Awards

Thursday February 9, 2012

We're now in the last week of the nomination phase for the 2012 Readers' Choice Awards. You have until next Wednesday, February 15, Valentine Recovery Day, to help me pick this year's finalists by nominating your favorites in eight categories, nominating them again, and urging others to nominate them. The more nominations a resource has, the more likely it will be selected to go to the next round.

This year, I added a question on the nomination ballot asking you why the blog, book, app, show, community, or regional resource you're nominating deserves an award, and I've loved reading your comments so much that I wanted to share them. In the spirit of using the Readers' Choice Awards as a way to shine a spotlight on and give some love to as many great special-needs resources as possible, I'm posting running lists of nominees so you can see what people are honoring and why. Though not all of these honorees will make it to the finals, they are deserving of recognition. See what your fellow readers have been recommending for:

Look over the current nominations and either give more support to the ones you love or make some new nominations for your favorites. I'll keep updating the list between now and next Wednesday. Thanks so much for helping me find and feature these great resources for families of children with special needs.

(Note: If you don't see something you've nominated on these lists, I've either moved it to another category, disqualified it for not fitting any category -- for example, a book that was not published in 2011 or a blog that is not specifically special-needs -- or been unable to find information about it on the Internet. If you re-nominate, please be sure to check the spelling and provide as much information as possible so I can track the resource down and include it.)

Book Shares Parents' Stories of Perinatal Hospice

Wednesday February 8, 2012

It seems odd to say that I enjoyed reading this week's Harried Parent's Book Club pick, which is about dying babies, more than I enjoyed last week's, which was about optimistic parents, but there it is. A Gift of Time, a book about perinatal hospice and palliative care filled with the voices of moms and dads who must face the unthinkable and find a way to cope and even triumph, is a compelling read on a topic most of us pray we'll never have to know about.

If you've read news stories about the Santorums bringing their deceased baby home or the Duggars sharing photos of theirs and wondered what was up with that, or puzzled over a pregnant friend or relative's decision to carry a severely disabled baby to term, A Gift of Time can introduce you to the compassionate and thoughtful reasons behind those decisions. The book will, naturally, be most of use to families who are facing these heartbreaking situations right now and need guidance and fellowship. But for all of us who value the lives of children with special needs, especially those who society most devalues, it offers an incredibly hopeful message. Optimistic, even.

Read the Harried Parent's Book Review of A Gift of Time, and of co-author Amy Kuebelbeck's earlier memoir, Waiting With Gabriel, for more information. If you've read one of these books, feel free to use the review form to add your opinion to mine.

_{Cover image courtesy of Johns Hopkins University Press}

Beware of Valentine's Day

Tuesday February 7, 2012

Heart Balloons Heads up! Valentine's Day is just a week away, and if that means treading carefully through a maze of restricted-diet issues and tricky emotions as you look for safe and appropriate ways of showing love, I've got a gift of guidance for you. Read Before You Celebrate Valentine's Day for information on safe sweets, restricted-diet-friendly classroom-party eats, food-free treats, and strategies for expressing love and explaining it. You may also want to download a few free, printable Valentine cards to give to the special-needs parents who mean the most to you. Maybe even yourself. We can use all the love we can get this time of year, no?

_{Photo by MJ Kim/Getty Images}

This Week in Outrage

Monday February 6, 2012

No Heart I read a lot of blog posts and news stories each day while adding to the Daily News page and, you know, procrastinating from real work, and every day I see stories that break my heart or raise my blood pressure. Many more good and upbeat and useful posts, too, but it's the angry ones that get under your skin and occupy your thoughts and make you snap at your children. Below are three stories I've seen over the last week that have been festering in my brain. I could probably write an angry post about each of them, but instead I'll pass them on to get your pulse pumping and your Monday off to a righteously indignant start. You're welcome.

+ Tracy Morgan, who last year compared young men with intellectual disabilities to chimps, joked around about special-education students with Jimmy Fallon on a recent Late Night. According to a post on HuffPost Comedy (and boy, is the term "comedy" being used loosely here), Morgan "had some less-than-kind material on New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady. Joking that he and Brady 'went to special-ed school together' and that Brady wore a crash helmet on a short bus." Nothing funnier than making fun of kids with disabilities, is there? Har de har har.

+ In an editorial in the Irish Examiner, a psychologist opined that autism is not a scientific fact, but merely the result of "children ... defending themselves against the absence of expressed love and affection and emotional receptivity." You mean, like, their moms are refrigerators? Novel idea! You can read one mom's response to the editorial on the blog The Voyage, and read the complete text and add your own outrage on the Irish Autism Action Facebook page.

+ A Florida special-education teacher thought that a good way to keep her students from chewing on crayons would be to dip the crayons in hot sauce. She's been removed from the classroom, and the district superintendent has called for her firing. Training teachers in behavioral techniques more advanced than aversives might also be a good idea, there, superintendent, while you're at it. You can read more about the story in a blog post on Care2.

Have you seen any recent stories that have made you shake your head or your fist? Share them in the comments, and I'll work them into this round-up or a future one.

Weekly Round-Up: Week of Jan. 30

Sunday February 5, 2012

Here's your weekend round-up of all the new content you may have missed from the past week on About Parenting Special Needs.

New Articles and Features

Blog Posts

Updated Pages

Read Archives

Explore Children With Special Needs

Must Reads

Kids With Special Needs

Related Blogs