Two more days, and my daughter will have made it through her first year of high school. It's a big accomplishment for her, and a big one for me, too, as I have learned to be less involved in her daily routine. I'm sure there are teachers who think I'm way overinvolved because I call or e-mail from time to time to ask questions. What they don't know is that for every question I've asked, there are about 100 that I've thought to ask and forced myself not to.
It's like that when you have kids who are almost but not quite able to run their own affairs. When they want independence but don't always "get" what's going on. When they come home having heard something that you're pretty sure they have not interpreted correctly, but have no good means of double-checking.
For example: My girl has assured me that kids with perfect attendance don't have to go to school these last two days. And ... well, maybe. Could be a tradition. She swears she heard it from a teacher. Not on the school website anywhere, though. Not easily verifiable. Are you sure, sweetie? Yes, mom! Do I call the office behind her back? Another parent? Or do I just figure that there's probably no harm from an unexcused absence at the very end of the quarter?
The school puts out an extremely detailed student handbook. But what I want is the crazily detailed student handbook, the one for controlling parents of clueless kids, the one with every student tradition and secret symbol and popular slang and teacher trick and possible student-related occurrence. Where do I pick that one up? It would help me let go if I had something to hold onto.
Make that call! My daughter with special needs just graduated from high school, and I made a friend of the main office secretary and the guidance office secretary – they were my lifelines!