Should Britney Spears Be Diagnosed With Something?

I'll admit, I have a habit of applying diagnoses with which I am familiar to people with whom I am not familiar. When I see a celebrity train wreck, in which the star seems to be pathologically incapable of making a good decision or of connecting the dots between cause and effect, I tend to think "Hmmm. Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder?"

I don't know if that could be the issue for Britney Spears -- although certainly, if you could imagine a young person with FASD allowed unlimited money and freedom with no "external brain" to put the world in order, I'm thinking that life would look a lot like what we've seen from the pop star these last few years. What seems undeniable to me, though, especially after her listless performance at the Video Music Awards, is that something is seriously wrong with this kid.

Maybe my special-needs antennae are just super-receptive after years of researching diagnoses for my own children, but there seem to be signs of a real problem here, rather than normal self-destructive pampered-celeb misbehavior. This is the task so many parents are faced with -- drawing the line between normal risk-taking and screwing up, and actual symptoms of mental or physical illness. To my mind, Spears has crossed that line. By quite a bit.

None of this is my business, really, and she's certainly got enough people gossiping about her without me. I guess I'm just thinking that I'd rather see her as a role model for getting diagnosed, getting help, and getting well -- especially for our kids who have challenges of their own -- than as a role model for wretched excess and irresponsibility. Or, as seems not-so-unlikely, as another dead celebrity.

'Fess up: Have you been diagnosing Britney Spears in your head, too? What is up with her, do you think? And what kind of help would you like to see her get? I'd say, for starters, she needs some strong and compassionate supervision, quick. Share your thoughts in the comments.