Twenty Things I Learned Reading Children's Fiction

Elizabeth Kennedy, About.com's guide to Children's Books, reminds us that it is both Children's Book Week and Reading Is Fun Week, and that's got me thinking about the many, many children's books I've read with my reluctant readers, and how sometimes that reading is not so fun at all.

I get that books for children or teens are written to help kids work their issues out, and that's why parents in these plots are so often part of the problem. We're not the target audience, us moms and dads who have to read with our reading-challenged offspring, and so we should just pass the words through without taking them too much to heart.

That's easier said than done, though, isn't it? Am I the only one who has trouble getting through these tales of school bullies, friendship traumas, teacher oppression, and sibling strife without wanting to grab those fictional parents by the lapels and yell, "Hey, pay attention! Something's going on with your kid!"?

Even when I like the parents, and they're trying hard, these books can be heart-wrenching. My shoulders sag a little each time Marty's dad in the Shiloh trilogy gets the weight of the world dumped on him, courtesy of his good-hearted, right-thinking, not-well-enough-alone-leaving son. That man needs a vacation, and so do I after I've read those books.

Still, just as our kids are supposed to learn from the fictional struggles of their peers, I suppose we can do the same. Here are twenty bits of parenting wisdom I've gained from children's books:

1. Listen when your child talks.
2. Listen when your child doesn't talk.
3. If your child doesn't want to talk about it, you do.
4. Never leave your child unsupervised.
5. If you wonder whether school is a living hell for your child, the answer is yes.
6. Check every hiding place in your house regularly.
7. Having a personal life of your own will cause you to neglect your child.
8. Not having a personal life of your own will cause you to smother your child.
9. If your child is sneaking food from the table, it's probably not to have a snack later.
10. Any surprise you get for your child will always be a letdown.
11. Don't take a teacher's or a principal's word on what's going on at school.
12. Don't take your child's word, though, either.
13. Or the word of your child's friends, or alleged friends, or siblings.
14. Might want to drive by the school at recess time now and then to see what goes on in that playground.
15. If your kids come in with ashes from Mount Vesuvius in their hair, don't believe them when they say they were just playing in some treehouse in the woods.
16. Get to know your children's friends. Run background checks, if necessary.
17. Never assume that because you told your child he couldn't have a pet, he doesn't have a pet.
18. Show up at your child's sporting events, talent shows, award ceremonies, and other important occasions. And not at the last minute, either.
19. There is one child at whose house you must never let your child stay overnight. You know which one, right?
20. The odds of you doing or saying the wrong thing are very high. But you've got to do and say stuff anyway.

Add your own lessons learned in the comments. And for more on children and reading, check out these articles:

• If Your Kid Hates Harry Potter
• Luring Reluctant Readers With Nonfiction
• Books on Reading
• Reading Sites of the Day