Some "Wife Swaps" I'd Like to See

Speaking of television shows, anybody out there watching the ABC show Wife Swap? Anybody who'll admit to it? My daughter, for some reason, finds it fascinating -- maybe because it makes lifestyle differences so very black and white, and she's not a kid who appreciates nuance. I'm not sure it's such savory viewing, but she's 18, and it's more age-appropriate than her Disney Channel favorites, so I let it go. And, in a train-wreck sort of way, can't avoid watching some myself.

If you've never seen the show -- and good for you! -- the concept is really less of a "wife swap," which implies impropriety, than a "mom swap." Two moms with radically different approaches to parenting and running a household and respecting their mate and basic hygiene skills switch homes and lives for two weeks. The first week, the transplanted wife has to follow the rules of her new family. The second week, she gets to set the rules. Disruptions, snit fits, enlightenment, and Life Lessons ensue. Or, you know, not.

Since the contrasts are always stark -- neat freak trading with slob, homeschooler trading with school teacher, atheist trading with evangelical, shopaholic trading with someone who hasn't had a wardrobe change in 20 years -- the first question that always comes to my mind is, "Why would anybody ever sign up for this?" And the second is, "If they did this with my family, which side would I be on? Would I be the organized and generally well-adjusted person trading with the nutjob? Or would I have the house that the other mother would pick through, saying with the audience, 'What on earth is wrong with this woman?' Would my family fight for our way of doing things, or would my husband and children be among those who say, 'You know, this new mom has some good ideas. What was that other lady's name again?'"

There are days when I feel strongly that the audience would be rooting for me. And there are days when I'm glad I'll never have to find out. One thing I do know is that I have no desire to trade lives with anyone. My family drives me crazy sometimes, but I wouldn't want to try again with someone else, nor would I want them to have the opportunity to try on an alternative. Neither do I feel I have so many answers that I must spread my parenting wisdom by planting myself in other people's households and setting their world right. Goodness, no.

Still, since some people do feel up for that challenge, it would be interesting to see what would happen with a special-needs spin on the concept. How about swapping a mom who believes vaccines cause autism with a mom who believes autism is a difference to be celebrated? I've read enough e-mail debates about what kind of special-needs are the hardest -- swap moms whose children have radically different sorts of special-needs issues and let them walk in those shoes. Given the currency of prenatal testing in the news, swap a mom who chose not to give birth to a child with Down syndrome with a mom who did. I'd suggest a swap between a mom who's protested peanut bans in school with a mom whose child has a peanut allergy, but a kid shouldn't have to go into anaphylactic shock for a TV show, even if it would make a point.

You could also, I suppose, swap some know-it-all who's sure all these special needs are made up with the mom of children with a variety of neurological and developmental and behavioral challenges, but you might have trouble getting that special-needs parent to switch back in just two weeks. Oh, yeah, we love our kids, but ... just one more week? a double episode? a sweeps special? Respite is where you find it.

Who would you like to see swap for some special-needs awareness? Make your pitch in the comments.

Read More: Special Needs News | Site of the Day | Entertainment News

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