What's your first thought when you see somebody staring at your kid?
They're being rude about your child's disabilities?
They think you're a crummy parent?
They need your fist to teach their eyes how to behave?
Yeah, it's easy to react defensively. Staring feels bad. But is it always meant meanly? Maybe, if we asked instead of assumed, we'd find out different.
That's one of the radically positive ideas presented by Judy Winter in Breakthrough Parenting, this week's Harried Parent's Book Club pick. I love the upbeat way Winter writes about special-needs parenting, and her section on staring, excerpted here, is no exception. Could that starer be somebody with a newly diagnosed child? An interest in special needs? A reasonable question? You'll never know if you shut down.
"Staring is part of the deal that comes with giving your child every opportunity to be fully included in society," Winter writes. Might as well make peace with it. Read Dealing With Staring for more of Winter's observations, and share your own staring experiences in the comments.
Read more: Special Needs News | Site of the Day | Book Excerpts
Cover image courtesy of Judy Winter
I’m guilty of staring sometimes. I’ll stare, because I’m filling my being with the knowledge that people with challenges *can* get out alone, that they *can* do normal things like go to the mall toting their oxygen canister along. I’m amazed by how far we’ve progressed to give greater freedoms, and I need to remember these powerful moments, despite economic recessions and bigotry and extreme short-sightedness all around.
Forgive me if I stare; I am watching a miracle, and I don’t want to forget it.
I do not mind that if someone is staring at my kids with curious eyes, I think it is the most of the case. I guess what do you think also depends on what values you believe. We live in the global society, too much difference we face, however we need respect each other and learn from each other. Succeed in Global Society