Read: "As the parent of two autistic children, I have been their shield and their sword since birth. I protect them from outside influences, which affect their routines and trigger their sensory issues, I fight for services at school, I pay for necessary and expensive medications and therapy and I have totally changed my own life style to accommodate their needs. The problem is that I don't know how far to go with all of this." -- Nianya, from the post "Parenting an Autistic Teen: Ignorance Is Not Bliss" on the blog The Magical Mischief Maker.
Reflect: Can I imagine laying down my sword and no longer fighting for my child? Have I done anything to help my child fight for himself or herself? What's one thing I can do today to start passing that responsibility along?
Respond in the comments with your own thoughts on this quote and how it applies to your life with your child.
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I am the Parent of 3 special needs children, 16, 15, & 13. As I am truly blessed and grateful everyday for their incredible beings, I am also in a constant defense mode. My children have been discriminated against & bullied in the Middletown, NJ school district for the past 10 years. I can’t imagine the day that I will be able to put down my shield & sword as I am sure that I will not no what to do with myself. How can a child of any age be able to stand up for themselves when so many stand against them. I have trouble knowing what is the right course of action, and just a few days ago my son was assaulted in a locker room in which the school’s punishment was to suspend the attacker for two days. How will that punishment teach that other child about what he did wrong? What message are they sending to my son again?
I wish I had all the answer’s but not sword will be put down anytime soon in my situation.
Hi,
I can empathize completely with your article. I have the unfortunate double edged sword of being a teacher of high school students with autism and having a son, recently diagnosed with Aspergers. The first question asked is why didn’t you get him identified earlier since you know so much?
I have the same answer as all parents-I didn’t want to look or name it.
I too knew that my son was being bullied, held against lockers, grabbed, having his belongings broken,locker tied shut etc…, but my two other children along with G. begged me not to do anything for fear of making things worse. On April 1st last year, one of the bullies friend’s asked G. to write down 10 people he didn’t like, so of course he did as he was asked. The young man wrote “Death List by G.” on it and turned it in. Since then it has been hell on earth. G. was locked in the principal’s office for over 2 1/2 hours unsupervised, arrested as a Columbine Killer etc….
Since that date until now I have been fighting to get an IEP even with a neurologist’s diagnosis and attorney. G. is being treated for adjustment disorder from the trauma. I don’t believe there will come a day when I will be able to put down my sword for G. or my students This has given me a new perspective on parenthood and unconditional love.