(to the tune of "All I Want for Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth")
All I want for Christmas is a good night's sleep,
A good night's sleep, a good night's sleep.
If I ever got to have a good night's sleep
Then I could stay awake for Christmas.
All I want for Christmas is my bed to myself
Without this intruding little elf.
If everyone could stay in their bed by themselves
Then I could sleep right straight through Christmas.
All I want for Christmas is no "Mommy, please!"
"Daddy, come here!" Oh, make it cease.
If I could maybe finally have a little peace
Then I could remember which day's Christmas.