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Victim Penalized for Bully's Behavior

Share Your Story: Share Your Child's Experience of Being Bullied Due to a Disability

By Jane V

Age/Grade of Child at Time of Bullying

He was in 6th grade and 13 years old.

Child's Disability or Special Needs

FAS, SID, PTSD

Type of School or School Placement

Inclusive

Who Did the Bullying?

A male classmate

What Happened

C could not "handle" J because he acts differently. He repeatedly taunted him at school. Finally on a Sunday he asked neighbors to pinpoint our house, came to our house and assaulted him. He threw J to the ground and kicked him in the face, neck and chest. My husband caught C and throttled him and told him to come back w/his parents. (We put C's bike in our garage.) I called the police. C came back to our door, initially saying he made a mistake, then when we stayed inside and quiet (per the 911 operator) C turned to threats. The police came and C spent 2 days in juvie and had 6 mo. probation.

How We Handled It

As both boys were in the same class I went to the school the next day. They put J in a different classroom (away from the teacher who got the most out of him) and had J stay in for recess to keep interaction from happening between the boys. In other words, J got penilized for C's assault. The next year we put J in a different school where I drive him to avoid busses and this school is extremely supportive of J. J is taking taekwondo which has finally helped him feel more empowered and has taken his mind off of what happened. After 1 1/2 years, he finally feels comfortable enough to go outside.

Advice

  • We took them to court (and lost!) for damages but even knowing the outcome, I'd do it again. It showed J that we'd fight for him to keep him safe.
  • I would move him to a different school earlier.
  • Cops are your friends... Use them if need be!

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