From the article: Ten Tips for Dining Out With a Child With Special Needs
Taking your child out to eat can be a fun treat or a nightmare for all, including everybody at a table within earshot. A successful meal out requires planning, preparation, supplies, and maybe a quick exit. How do you make it work? Share Your Strategies
Seating
- I always try to sit in the back of the restaurant. I get a table next to a wall or sat in a booth near a wall. Then I block everyone else around me out and go on as if I was at my own dinner table.
- —Guest Ethel
Look around at what other kids are doing
- I always forget this part. My son's therapy supervisor is always reminding me not to hold my child to a higher standard than other kids his age. I think we're at risk of this because we are working on goals ALL THE TIME so I forget that not every activity needs to be a therapeutic one, and I forget to watch what typical behavior is for other kids his age. Truth be told, not every restaurant expects the same behavior from children. So if its 5:00 and we were just seated next to the kitchen, and are surrounded by other families, then I can relax on the volume and movement a little bit. I like to stay consistent on the table manners, because that reinforces learning for any child, and are always appreciated, in every setting. But if we're in a loud environment, with loud music, and other loud kids, then expecting church pew behavior is unrealistic.
- —teefairf
Go Out For Dessert First
- Start introducing things in tiny steps and in our home we often started the training backwards. So why not DESSERT FIRST. That means we would eat dinner at home or something light and go to the restaurant for apple pie and ice cream or just ice cream. This was a great way to practice manners in a short time, it was less frustrating and it offered a focused field trip for fun. The other way to do it is go for an appetizer session or hit the buffets. Buffets and a booth in an area out of the way - especially where you PAY before you sit down so you can get out "when time is over" - meaning the kid can't handle another social seconds works really well.
- —Guest Jodee Kulp
Portable Game Systems
- We have discovered that portable game systems are a god-send!! We take them everywhere, even to church. Like others have said, it's a little odd to see someone playing a Nintendo DS during the sermon, but would you rather have my child playing a game or making all sorts of distractions? Either way, he's not paying attention to the message, and there's no getting him to settle down long enough to do so. Why fight it?
- —paulbahr
Choosing wisely
- When we go out, we first consider Matt's diet and the environment of the restaurant. He seems to stress out in busy loud places, so we choose more quiet 'diner' type restaurants so he stays calmer.
- —Guest lizziejean1964
DVD Dining
- Ok, it may not be considered PC to bring a portable DVD player with you to a restaurant; but having your child demonstrate his "Mr. Hyde" side of his personality isn't really accepatable either. We tried this and use it as a last resort when our "Energizer Bunny" needs to have his sensory needs reined in for a short time. We keep the sound low and try to keep it from being too obvious. My take on it...it allows me to enjoy my meal and my child eats more of that dish I am paying for during our time out. All the other ideas above are good and should be tried first. However, when all else fails, I pull the Ace hidden up my sleeve. Just be sure to remember to charge the battery & pick a "soothing" video. (Sing-a-longs aren't a good suggestion necessarily!) Pack everything in a little bag or backpack to transport or beat a quick retreat! This has helped Mommy's stress level which helps EVERYONE'S stress level!
- —Guest Sharon
Prepare, Prepare, Prepare
- Consider social stories, Plan for success which will take small steps. Do not expect your child to succeed in a long outing the first time out. We started with small quiet venues and we went only for a meal not a five course meal. Go when the rest. isn't at it's busiest, let your child sit with their back against the wall to reduce stimulation. For first outings avoid rests. with a lot of noise and visual stimulation. Let your child participate in the experience, menus, teach them how to order, let them pay, teach them to recognize when the meal will end, having them pay will also give them a purpose during the transition to leave the rest. Bring hand fidget toys. If at first you don't succeed, don't give up. My son is very sensitive to sounds and new environments but as he got older he's done very well, even to the point that we can go and have a long meal with 3 or 4 courses but it took lots of practice to get there.
- —Guest Sally N
Good ones - here's one more...
- I also order my child's meal as soon as we sit down and ask them to bring it as soon as it's ready instead of waiting to bring it with the rest of the meals.
- —Guest Psychobabbler
