From the article: Finding the Perfect Gift for a Child With Special Needs
Maybe it was the party you threw for your child that no one attended. Or the one your child went to and wreaked havoc. Maybe it was the way the other moms looked at you and whispered. Or the way all the gifts were far beyond your child's developmental interest. If you have a child with special needs, chances are you've been to kiddy parties that made you want to weep. Vent about those unhappy birthdays here. Share Your Experience
Unwanted Guest
- I made a mistake and invited a unwanted guest to my daughter's birthday party. My daughter said she was very spoiled, sore loser, and a bossy person who sticks around my daughter every time. Sadly, the unwanted guest came and destroyed the party. She kicked the cake drew on the walls and worst of all, broke my daughter's presents.
- —Guest Ellen
Carnvial letdown
- My son has aspbergers syndrome, a form of autism. He attended a half day daycare which was great and had a total of about 12-14 kids. I decided to throw him a BIG carnival style birthday. I invited all the kids....one showed up and left early. It was such a huge let down but Im lucky my son was only 2 and probably wont remember.
- —Guest Ashlee
Teacher Sabotage
- My daughter was in second grade, her first year in an inclusion class instead of self-contained. I was used to being able to invite her whole class to birthday parties, but couldn't do that with 20-some students. I had my daughter pick who she wanted to invite, but since I didn't know any of these kids or their parents, I didn't know how to get the invites out. So I foolishly asked the teacher if she could discretely distribute them to the chosen guests. Instead, she announced in front of the class whose birthday invitations these were and read off the names to hand them out. If handing out invitations quietly in class isn't something she does, okay, I get that. But she could have told me before embarrassing my daughter. I think she was annoyed at having inclusion kids in her class, and took it out on us.
- —Guest Liz E.
Sweet 16 Turned Sour 16
- Planned a sweet 16 limo ride and dinner at the yacht club hoping to entice my daughter's "friends" at school to join her. Limo picked her up at school (and supposedly the other 9 girls who RSVP'd) only one other girl showed up, I wanted to cry. I had the limo drive pick up her two older sisters, and they tried to make it a fun time. I thought the limo and yacht club would have enticed the other girls...but I guess not....my daughter said it was the worst birthday she ever had, and I agree...I'll never do that again.
- —Guest Joanne in Rochester
I bought the wrong toy
- My son has Asperger's syndrome, and one of the central elements of this condition is perseverations on different themes. My son has always wanted certain toys and had no interest in others. For birthdays and holidays he would ask for multiples sets of toys he already had! Occasionally there would be a new obsession, and one year it was a certain toy from a cartoon, and he gleefully showed me when a commercial game on. I bought several items from it for him to unwrap at the family birthday with his grandparents and cousins. Apparently I had misunderstood and bought the wrong size of the same toy. This caused a total crying meltdown and temper tantrum at his party! He was inconsolable and I was mortified. Fortunately as he has gotten older, his ability to control disappointment has dramatically improved.
- —Guest Guest June
TwinMom
- Funny, we are having a video game party tomorrow. One boy's mom called but she "is terrible with directions" so I have to pick him up early. I'm irritated but want my sons to have kids over! Another reason we should get those "special parent" awards.
- —Guest Sarah
birthday party disaster
- My son was once invited to a birthday of another child who has an emotional disturbance. It turns out that most of them had some sort of mood disorder. The party went fine until the mom brought out my nightmare -- a pinata!! OK folks, for all that do not know, PLEASE do not blindfold, put a big stick in the kids hand, spin him, and then encourage him to whack something as hard as possible. It was mayhem for the whole experience as at least 3 of the boys got overstimulated and wouldn't stop whacking not only the pinata but everything else nearby. JUST SAY NO TO PINATAS!
- —Guest debfjeld
No RSVP
- I planned a party for my daughter when she turned 7. I printed up fliers for her to take to daycare (summer birthday - no addresses for school chums). I didn't put an RSVP on it. No one showed, except her cousin. They had a grand time, and I decided that we would do either "all family" or invite a couple close friends for future parties.
- —bugwoman27
The party that wasn't
- When my daughter turned 9, it was a tough time for a birthday party. We were new to the area and didn't know the one family with kids who lived 3 doors down. Not only was she new in the school district, but she was on home bound services. The last 6 weeks of the school year she only went 1/2 days, and we didn't bother trying for mainstreaming during that time. So, the only kids she knew were the 7 or 8 kids from her DCD classroom. I invited all of them, and all RSVP'd, many of whom said it was the first party their kid had been invited to in years. Sadly, not one showed up. But 2 days before the party we met a little girl who also has DS, and her mom commented she hadn't been invited to a party yet that year, and there were only 2 weeks of school left. She was the only guest for our party, and it turned out great! The two girls had a blast playing together and we made a friendship that will last a lifetime. Last year only 2 out of 6 invited showed up.
- —Guest Leah
